fun fun fun till your daddy takes the costume catalogue away

You know it's October when your newspaper starts packing costume catalogues.

I love these things; it reminds me of the time when I was a kid and my parents wouldn't lemme go outside to trick n' treat because I'd get mugged, so then I'd just stare at the catalogues wistfully.


halloween costume catalog

I love this picture. For some reason, the book cuts off Spider-Man's arm on the right there, but that's not what I want you to look at. I want you to look at the picture for "Spider-Man Black Muscle" and then "Spider-Man Red Muscle."

If you didn't notice, that is some mad photoshopping skills there. Must be pretty hard to go to the "Colors" option and change the Reds to Blacks.

halloween costume catalog

It'd be pretty funny if this was photoshopped from the same image too, but not even the magic of Photoshop can change a Child Small into an Adult Standard. There is no god.

Aside from image alterations, though, there's another constant about Halloween costumes: the idealized and impossible portayal of body images. 

I mean, how's anyone supposed to attain Iron Man's steel abs? Or the Incredible Hulk's impossibly masculine ripped pants?

halloween costume catalog

Or Optimus Prime's to-die-for faceplate?

It stirs self-confidence issues in young impressionable boys I tell ya. They're gonna worry about how they look, and it may lead to some unhealthy eating habits, if you know what I mean.

By which I mean buying Apple Dippers from McDonald's. Those things are crazy overpriced.

And speaking of body image, well, the girls' costumes are pretty much what you'd expect: somewhat sexualized and just plain indecent, which is a darn shame. There were some fun ones, though, like the Fashion Flapper from the 20s or the Go-Go Girl of the 70s:

halloween costume catalog

but I just wanted to bring up one last thought:

halloween costume catalog

Those claws totally clash with that hat.

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